{"id":434,"date":"2013-09-07T22:52:16","date_gmt":"2013-09-08T03:52:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/extraterrestrialvisitor.wordpress.com\/?p=434"},"modified":"2013-09-07T22:52:16","modified_gmt":"2013-09-08T03:52:16","slug":"late-bloomer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.extraterrestrialvisitor.com\/?p=434","title":{"rendered":"Late Bloomer"},"content":{"rendered":"

Many of you don\u2019t know it, but I\u2019m old enough to be your grandpa. Don\u2019t let the hip, irreverent voice that I write in fool you \u2013 I\u2019m old.<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve met a lot of writers – most of them say something like: \u201cOh, I\u2019ve always written.\u201d I can\u2019t say that \u2013 unless I can count my graffiti on the sides of bridges or the walls of bus stop shelters. Some were complete sentences. No, I decided to be a writer at the age of 50. I think it was right after the tattoo, or maybe the ear piercing. I\u2019m not sure.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I was encouraged to write by my children, who were both in college at the time. Like most parents, I would send them a few dollars or a care package of essentials like Green Bay Packer clothing, cigarette rolling papers, bottle openers and Hostess Cupcakes or Twinkies. I\u2019d write and include a fictitious story of how I obtained the loot. I\u2019ll share one with you:<\/p>\n

Dear Son,<\/i><\/p>\n

Enclosed you will find the plunder from my current crime spree.<\/i><\/p>\n

My haul from this caper was larger than the fifty dollars enclosed here, but I had to deduct the $28 that I spent on gas for cruising around town to find a proper victim. Now that I have a good location staked out, my gas expense should be far less in the future.<\/i><\/p>\n

I now have a handicapped parking sticker. It will allow me to wait for my next target, eliminating the need to continuously circle the block.<\/i><\/p>\n

Make this money last, son, because I won\u2019t be able to strike again until my back heals. I hurt myself by lifting that old guy out of his wheelchair to empty his pockets.<\/i><\/p>\n

Love,<\/i><\/p>\n

Dad<\/i><\/p>\n

These kids have a nose for discovering literary talent, don\u2019t they?<\/p>\n

So, because of their insistent prodding, I took a writing class two nights a week and was hooked. Since then, I write at least three pages every day \u2013 just like the Unabomber did.<\/p>\n

I think the best part of starting my writing career later in life is that I won\u2019t have to wait 20 years to be published like so many of you other, younger, writers will.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll be dead by then.<\/p>\n

(Originally written August 15, 2003)<\/em><\/p>\n

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